Our Pine Mountain Boys Academy Journey With Our Son

There came a point and time when all our efforts to help Maddox were not enough. He was unwilling and/or unable to accept any help, guidance, or correction from us. He would attempt to manipulate and twist our interactions to get what he wanted. He was inwardly focused and everything was transactional. His sole focus was to do what he wanted, and he would only do so if there was something in it for himself. He was lying. He was verbally and emotionally abusive. The tipping point came when these interactions threatened to become physical. Our home was a battleground. It was not a place of refuge for any of us. We knew we could not continue as we were. We started looking into places where we felt Maddox would get the guidance and tools he would need to be a functioning adult who could have healthy relationships, even if those relationships didn’t include us. All our prayer and research kept pointing us to Pine Mountain Boys Academy.

Even up to the last day before dropping him off, we prayed that there would be a sign that we would not have to go through with it. We ultimately concluded that the only thing worse than sending him away would be to keep him at home. Our son’s time at PMBA was more than we could have hoped for in so many ways. It was challenging for him and for us. We committed fully to the program for his sake and our family. We stayed in contact with his counsellor, discussed his progress, what he was working on, and asked how we could support him. We wrote him weekly, challenging him to “do the hard work” laid before him, lean into God and the teachings he was receiving, and let him know that we weren’t going to give up on him. We prayed and prepared for our bi-monthly phone calls and family visits, always speaking truth and love to our son. As Maddox progressed in the program and we started to see positive changes, we stayed the course … knowing and trusting the program. We read the books he was reading so we could discuss what he was learning and learn things ourselves. We prayed continually for our boy, the PMBA staff, and for God to reveal to ourselves and our other kids changes we needed to make.

After graduation, we stayed the course. We talk with our son about how “life is a program” and we must continue to do the hard work set before us. Our family has been restored and our home is no longer a battleground. Just as during Maddox’s time at PMBA, we have fully committed to following the after-care plan put in place and those guardrails have allowed our son to show us his trustworthiness and maturity. Of course, there have been disagreements, but the tools he learned at PMBA have enabled him and us to move through those with love and understanding.

From our very first phone call to Pine Mountain, we felt supported. You could tell the staff does what they do because they love the mission of Teen Challenge, and they take it very seriously. They are used by God to restore boys to their families and give them life-changing relationship tools. They were always there, ready to pray with us, answer our questions, and support us through this journey. They are still there, all these months later. While it was one of the hardest decisions we ever had to make, we are so glad we did. Our family is restored.